Valentines Day Norms!

The culture of Valentines has roles and restrictions depending on the age and the gender of the person.

Children (+7-14): At this stage, I hope kids don't have a relationship right now because....yeah, way too young. In elementary classes at the very least, they play the role of the giver and the receiver when it comes to valentines day customs. Kids hand out their pre-made cards they worked on the last couple days and the overall goal becomes gaining the most cards or favoring the people that stick candy to their cards.

For adult women: Often we're charged as the receiver. We're not expected to reciprocate the gift giving. I mean, if you're in a relationship, you should WANT to give your partner/spouse/whatever something special. Not out of obligation because we expect them to get something or because we feel bad they got us something if we didn't want it and we have to pay them back. It should be because we WANT to.
* I'm sorry. she looks a little mental in this picture...

For adult men: There are stereotypical traditions that men must follow on this very Red and Pink day. Chocolates, Flowers, and a Card is the holy trinity of a valentines gift. 1800flowers.com advertises hard on their part to sell sell sell the bouquet of flowers as much as they can. Variations include a teddy bears or other stuffed animals.

The mere day sparks a frenzy of mixed feelings and shopping among those that choose to participate. The rhetors expect that there will be gifts, food, dressing up, and time spent with your significant other. It's what our culture has been accustomed to expecting those rules.

On the flip side, what are the roles of those that don't have that special someone. There are those to choose to bash and hate a day that excludes them. Personally, you make what you can of the day. You don't need a special someone. Sometimes it's the personal accomplishments that make the day just as special. Everyone chooses to react to the day in different ways. Some will spend it with friends and have an "Anti-Valentines Day" out of spite of the day to bring a sense of community among one another, some find different definitions of Valentines Days and celebrate it with people they love. And there are some people that make the day no different from any other day.

There is no WRONG or RIGHT in Hearts and Hooves Day (My Little Pony Reference: Don't shoot me). 

No one said that if you don't do "this, this, and that" then you're not "doing Valentines Day right". There isn't a criteria that you must check off to make "Valentines Day Complete". There is simply doing. Maybe not even that. Customs usually entail the couples and people that are in a relationship to go crazy with the chocolate, gifts, and dinner reservations or romantic ambiance, but I think it can be interpreted up to the person. People make what they want of the day. No one has dictated that the person you celebrate it with is someone you're in love with and want an intimate relationship with.

Facebook posts have people celebrating Valentines Day for losing weight (loving yourself), shout outs to the family and friends that support them (Love between friends and family), glad with where they are in life (loving the decision they make and being happy with what they're doing with their life), or the cliche loving your special person.

I would agree with the idea that it doesn't exist until we, as rhetors, decide what it should look like because people make what the want to make the day in their eyes. It doesn't have to be less special based on mentality, but there are people that CHOOSE to make it a horrifying day where they image themselves: 

I strongly believe mentality and attitude determines how to respond to a situation. If people choose to wallow in self pity, gush to everyone about their new bf, keep it romantic and private, or spend it with friends: then that's up to them.